Somewhere I Belong
by psych21
Summary: In the aftermath of 'Endgame', can Martin and Samantha find where they belong?
1. Seven Days

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter One

**A/N: Hello all! This story started because of a plot bunny that came to me in a dream. It's not my first fanfic, but it is my first WaT story. So please let me know what you think! Thanks!**

It happened seven days ago. Seven days ago, her heart stopped and she felt like she was suffocating. She had felt fear before, like when she was caught in the hostage situation a while back, but this fear was different. For the first time in her life, she felt true fear for someone besides herself. Seven days ago her world changed. Seven days ago, Danny and Martin were ambushed while transferring Adisa. While Danny was considered lucky, only taking a bullet in his left shoulder, Martin was in worse shape.

She sat by his hospital bed with his right hand clasped tightly in hers and staring at his face. The only noises in the room were the various machines that he was connected to. Heart monitors, life support machines and IV's were connected to all different parts of his body, sustaining his life until he was healed enough to do it on his own. That sickening hospital smell, disinfectants mixed with death and suffering, drove her to the brink of insanity. She had always hated hospitals and tried to avoid them as much as possible. But now, the hospital called to her like a siren beckoning her to this room. So she stayed and she waited.

For seven days now he has been in a coma, and for seven days she has stayed by his side almost constantly. Only leaving to let Martin's family have some time with him, change clothes, occasionally eat, visit Danny and Viv, and stop in at work, she maintained her vigil at his bedside. A good night's sleep was something that she had learned to live without over the past week, instead opting to spend the entire night watching him and waiting for him to wake up. Sometimes she would talk to him about anything and everything that entered her mind. Other times, like now, she simply held on to his hand and memorized his face for the millionth time. She knew it was silly, but sometimes she thought that if she stared at him long and hard enough he would open his eyes and stare back.

Even though she heard the clicking of shoes as someone entered the room, she didn't take her eyes off of Martin.

"How is he?" Danny asked quietly, coming over to stand behind Samantha. He felt bad that this was the first time he had come to visit his best friend. He had been released from the hospital less than twenty-four hours after the shooting so he had no real excuse—except that he was afraid and feeling guilty. No matter how many times he tried to tell himself otherwise he still thought that there was something more he could have done to prevent Martin from getting shot. Maybe he could have called out a warning faster, or insisted that they have an escort while transferring Adisa. There had to have been some way to prevent this from happening.

"He's the same." Samantha replied, glad that Danny had finally come by. Danny had been avoiding Martin's room and kept putting off any trips to see him. She understood why though. The feelings of guilt were evident on Danny's face. Besides, she knew him too well.

He wasn't sure what else to say so he settled on some small talk. "How long have you been here?"

She let out a huge sigh. "Feels like forever."

"He'll wake up." Danny told her, trying to sound enthusiastic and positive. "He has to."

Samantha gently laid Martin's hand back down on the bed and stood up to face Danny. Then she did something that she didn't do very often. She reached out and carefully gave Danny a hug, making sure that she didn't hurt his shoulder.

He was surprised by the hug. In all the years that he had known her, she had never once hugged him. Maybe being in love with Martin had opened up her softer side after all. "What was that for?"

"Can't a girl just hug her friends every once and a while?" Samantha smiled weakly.

"Yeah, of course they can. But we're talking about you here. You never hug." He eyed her suspiciously.

"Well I've come to a few conclusions while sitting here."

He chuckled for the first time since the attack. Samantha has come up with conclusions? This should be good. "Such as what?"

"For starters, the line between life and death is a thin one. You never know when something bad is going to happen to someone you care about so you should never hold back anything." She glanced back at Martin. "He left that night not knowing how much I lo…" She shut her eyes tightly to drive away the tears that threatened to fall. "I'm not letting that happen again to anyone I care about. You're one of my closest friends and I'm sorry that I don't show that as often as I should."

"It's ok." He didn't expect her to have come up with such a serious conclusion, but was glad. Maybe this meant that she was going to open up more. If so, perhaps her relationship with Martin could still be salvaged—once he woke up.

She sat back down and laid her hand down on Martin's. "So how are you doing?"

"Fine." Danny replied, not wanting to talk about himself.

"Ok." She didn't believe him, but didn't push because she saw that he didn't want to talk about it. She would let it go for now, but made a mental note to ask him about it later. "When are you going to be able to return to work?"

"Probably a couple of weeks. Van Doren wants to make sure that my shoulder is completely healed first." He replied, looking at his watch. "I better get going."

"What? So soon? You just got here." She couldn't believe that he was already leaving after spending only minutes here.

"I've gotta go visit Viv. I promised I'd stop by after dinner." He hated using Viv as a cover for his lie, but he wasn't sure how much longer he could stay in Martin's room without the guilt overtaking him.

"Ok." Samantha resigned. "Tell her I said hello."

"I will." Danny gave a small smile.

"Take care of yourself." She called out as he left.

"You too."

Soon it was just Samantha, Martin, and the countless machines left in the room. "Looks like it's just us again." Stifling a yawn, she grabbed a hold of his hand again. As she looped her fingers through his, she kissed each one of his knuckles. After yawning a second time decided to lay her head down for just a moment to take a quick power nap.

* * *

Slowly opening her eyes, she moved away from Martin's bed and stretched out. Because her back hurt and there were kinks in her neck she knew that she had slept in that chair for at least two hours. She was frustrated when she looked at the clock and saw that it was already ten in the morning. Jack was going to be so furious with her for not showing up to work. Grabbing her purse, she laid a soft kiss on Martin's forehead before rushing off to work. 

Twenty minutes later, she rushed off the elevator and headed straight for Jack's office. "Jack, I'm so sorry…"

"Well look who decided to come to work." He joked gruffly. Then he turned serious. "Let me guess. You were at the hospital again?"

"Yes." She nodded, hoping that he wasn't going to be mad. "I fell asleep."

"I figured as much." The truth though, was that about an hour ago he called the hospital and found out that she was sleeping in Martin's room again. Rather than having the nurse wake her up, he let her get some rest. He took in her appearance. She was still wearing the same thing she wore yesterday. There were dark circles forming under her eyes as well. "You look exhausted. Maybe tonight you shouldn't spend so much time at the hospital with Martin. Maybe instead you should have a nice meal and get some sleep in a comfortable bed."

"I can't do that Jack." She objected. "I have to be there for him once he wakes up."

"So the first thing you want him to see is someone who looks worn out? No offense Samantha, but you look terrible."

She finally just snapped. All of the emotions that she had been feeling for the past week started flowing out. "I know what I'm doing Jack! Just leave me alone about this!"

"I'm only trying to look out for you." He quietly explained, "That's what friends do."

"I know. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that." She walked over and sat on his couch, burying her head in her hands. "Everything's just such a mess right now."

"Martin is going to be ok. He's strong." Jack was glad to see that Samantha was finally starting to let out her feelings about Martin's condition. She had been bottling it up for too long. For the past few days she had been acting almost like a robot.

She looked over at Jack, contemplating whether or not to let him in on her latest secret. Finally deducing that she couldn't keep it a secret forever, she decided to let him know. He'd need to know sooner or later anyway. "It's not just about Martin."

He was confused and moved to sit on the other side of the couch. "Then what else is bothering you?"

"The night of the shooting, before I transferred Paige, I got a call from my doctor. I wasn't feeling very well and, Jack, I'm pregnant." She waited to see Jacks' reaction.

That was the last thing he ever expected Samantha to tell him. While it did hurt him when he first found out about her relationship with Martin, he could tell that she was happier with him. Once he released his feelings of jealousy, he realized that she deserved to be happy. So Samantha was now pregnant with Martin's child? Well she was right when she said that things were a mess. "How far along are you?"

"Almost three months." She whispered.

The surprised him. "You're that far along already?"

She didn't want to have to justify herself, but did anyway. "I've been distracted with other things lately."

"Like your break-up with Martin?" He asked softly.

"Yeah." She nodded.

They sat there together for a few moments, each lost in their own thoughts. He couldn't believe that she was going to be a mother. She had always acted like she never wanted kids of her own. "So, you're gonna be a mother?"

"Looks like it." She chuckled. "You're the first person I've told."

"You've been keeping this a secret for a week now?" He was impressed, but he shouldn't have been. Samantha was very experienced at keeping secrets.

"It just never seemed like the right time to tell anyone. But now, I guess I just had to tell someone." She ran her fingers through a strand of her hair, just like Martin used to do. He would always wake up first in the morning and would run his fingers through her hair when he thought she was still asleep. He didn't know that she usually pretended to be asleep just to let him play with her hair. "What if he doesn't wake up? Or he does wake up but doesn't want me? What if he doesn't want this child? What am I going to do if he wants this child but not me?"

Jack put his arm around her shoulder. "It's going to be ok. No matter what, you have people who care about you and will do anything to help you. Danny and Viv are going to be here for you. I'm sure of it. And I'll help you any way I can."

She gave a small smile. "Thanks Jack. That means a lot."

"Now, I want you to take the day off and go home. Get some rest and eat a good meal for once."

"Jack…we have paperwork and with Danny and Viv gone…"

He interrupted her. "I'll handle the paperwork. Don't worry about it. You need to be taking better care of yourself now. Your life isn't just about you anymore. So go, ok?"

She wanted to argue with him, but sighed and decided that it wasn't worth it. He was right. She did have to take better care of herself these days. "Fine."

"I expect you to come back tomorrow better rested." Jack ordered.

Standing up, she mock saluted him and said, "Yes sir!" On her way of the office, she turned back to face him. "Thanks for listening to me."

"Anytime." He smiled, watching her leave his office.

* * *

Danny strolled down a street that he had walked along hundreds of times before, not paying attention to where he was going. He had nowhere to go and nothing to do since he couldn't go back to work yet. Of course he could go visit Vivian or Martin, but he didn't want to pretend he was fine in front of Vivian and he was terrified of entering Martin's hospital room again. While he was visiting yesterday, he wanted to crawl out of his skin, sink into a corner and hide from the world. 

Memories of the shoot out played almost constantly in his mind and the guilt he was feeling threatened to swallow him whole. He was falling; he knew he was falling, but he didn't know how to stop. He didn't know how to get rid of the guilt he was feeling. He was fine, except for the sling he has to wear and the couple of weeks that he has to miss from work. Martin however, wasn't so lucky. He had so many thoughts and feelings running through his head that he just wanted to scream. Instead he kept walking. About five minutes later he stopped on a street corner, and while waiting at the crosswalk, saw he was standing right in front of a bar. He toyed with the idea of going inside and getting something to drink even though it wasn't even noon yet. He needed an escape from this guilt, and he needed it quickly. Maybe alcohol could help.

Against his better judgment he entered the bar and climbed onto a bar stool.

"A little early for a drink, isn't it?" The bartender asked, walking over to his customer. When Danny didn't respond, the man realized that the man in front of him was not going to be very talkative. "What can I get you?"

Danny hesitated, knowing that this wasn't the best thing to do. There were other ways of dealing with guilt that didn't involve getting drunk. He just couldn't think of them right now. "I'll have a beer."

"Ok." The bartender worked quickly and placed a beer in front of Danny just a few seconds later.

He sat there watching the beer that had been placed in front of him and contemplated what he was about to do. Taking a deep breath, he picked up the beer and started moving it closer and closer to his mouth. He was just a few seconds away from taking his first drink in a very long time when his cell phone rang. "Damn." He cursed softly, even though deep down inside he was glad for the interruption.

He thought about ignoring whoever was calling him, but after the fifth ring he couldn't take it anymore. "Taylor."

"Danny, hey. It's Samantha." She could tell that he sounded tense and wondered why. "Did I interrupt something?"

He sighed and took a glance at the beer on the bar. "Nothing important. What's up?" He tried to sound happier.

"Jack gave me the day off. I was about to order a pizza for lunch and wanted to know if you were free to join me."

"You don't want to eat alone?" He guessed.

"No I don't, but I also want to talk to you about something." Since telling Jack about the pregnancy, she felt better and had decided to tell Danny and Vivian too.

"Sounds serious." He wasn't sure what she wanted to talk to him about.

"It is, but I don't want to say it over the phone." Samantha replied.

"Is it Martin?" He asked softly. "Did something happen?"

"No. He still hasn't woken up." She shook off the sadness she felt about that and tried to be more optimistic. "So are you coming for pizza or what?"

Danny looked back at the beer. He could either sit here and drink himself into oblivion or go have pizza with Samantha. While normally that would be a no-brainer question, it took him a few seconds to come up with the answer. "I'll be right there."


	2. New Purpose

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Two

**A/N: Thank you to middiegurl08 and wItHouT a tRacEfReAk for your reviews! They are very appreciated and I hope you continue to enjoy the story.**

Sam mindlessly flipped through the channels on her television, noting that there wasn't anything really entertaining on in the daytime. Thankfully, there was a knock on her door that was characteristic of Danny. "Hey." She gave a small smile as she opened the door.

"Hey." He replied, coming into her apartment and making himself comfortable on the couch.

She glanced at her watch. "The pizza should be here soon. You want something to drink?"

He cringed slightly at her wording. Yes he did want something to drink, but he couldn't be honest with her. He wouldn't drink in front of anyone he knew, especially not Sam. Plastering a smile on his face, he nodded. "Do you have any soda?"

"Sure." She disappeared into the small kitchen and came out a few seconds later with a soda for him and some water for her. "Thanks for coming over."

He took the can from her and gave a small smile. "No problem. I wasn't doing anything important anyway." Opening the can, he took a big drink and, as the caffeinated beverage slid down his throat, imagined that it was something stronger. Tricking himself into believing that the soda contained alcohol seemed to calm his nerves and satisfy his urges. "So why did Jack give you the day off? I would have thought that you two would be bombarded with paperwork since you're the only two that can work right now."

"Oh believe me, we are. I was surprised Jack when gave me the day off too." She took a drink of her water and then stared into the bottle. "Actually, that's what I wanted to talk to you about."

He didn't like the vibe he was picking up from her. "Something's wrong, isn't it?"

"Nothing's wrong…but there is something going on with me that I think you should know about." She looked up from the bottle. "I originally wanted Martin to know first, but that may not happen for a while and this sort of news needs to shared."

"So this thing is serious?" He didn't like the way this conversation was going. With Viv's heart problems, the shooting, and Martin's coma, he couldn't take any other bad news.

"Yeah." She nodded. "I don't know exactly how to say this so I'm just going to spit it out. I'm pregnant."

Danny had unfortunately chosen that time to take a drink of his soda. When Sam announced her pregnancy, the soda in his mouth was projected all over the place. Choking, he said, "You're what?"

"You heard me. I'm pregnant." Sam replied quietly, grabbing a handful of tissues and cleaning up the soda that was now on the floor.

"Yeah, but how? I mean, I thought you and Martin were careful and stuff…"

"We were," Sam replied, "but there was this one night that we weren't. I guess one night is all it takes."

"Wow." He was shocked. Sam and Martin were going to be parents. His thoughts centered around Martin. He didn't know that he was going to be a father, and wouldn't until he woke up--if he woke up. This child was just another reason why Martin didn't deserve to be the one hurt. It should have been him in the coma right now and Martin should be the one sitting here with Sam, finding out about her pregnancy.

"Wow is right." Sam echoed, drawing Danny out of his reverie. "I never pictured myself having children; I never wanted them and always thought it would be a bad idea."

"So in the past you've never wanted children." They had never talked about whether or not she wanted children, but he had always guessed that she didn't. Now that she really was pregnant, he was almost afraid to ask his question. "And what do you think about children now?"

She chuckled and gave him a smirk. "Well, it's still a bad idea." The smirk then left her face and was replaced with a solemn look. "But this child is a part of Martin, and I can't discard it like an old newspaper. I don't want to discard this child. I have to have this child. I'm probably going to end screwing up this child's life, but I guess that's why there are therapists in the world. Who knows, maybe I won't be the worst mother in the world."

Danny let go of a breath he didn't realize he was holding. While he supported a woman's right to choose, he wouldn't have been happy if Sam chose not to have the baby. He reached out and touched her arm. "I think you'll be a great mother. If there's anything I can do, I'll be glad to do it. Uncle Danny is at your service." They both chuckled at that, but for Danny, that comment brought him back to another time.

_Danny walked into the living room of the house ahead of Martin. "You know Martin, I see you and Sam in a place like this." Although Martin shook his head as if to tell him to shut up, he continued anyway. "I do. Barbecuing out back with the kids, Uncle Danny coming over to shoot some hoops…"_

_Martin just grinned. "Oh I've seen your hook shot. You better start working on it now."_

_Never one to let someone have the last word, Danny added, "ah, I'm unstoppable and you know it." _

Thinking of that memory only hurt him more and piled on more guilt. He missed his best friend and could only imagine what Sam was going through. If Martin didn't wake up, Sam would be left to raise this child as a single parent and Martin might never get to hold his child. He couldn't think about that though. Martin had to be ok. "Who else knows?"

"Just you and Jack. I haven't told Viv yet, and well, Martin obviously doesn't know." She wiped her left eye in an attempt to block the tears that threatened to fall.

"He's going to be ok." Danny consoled her, bringing her into a hug.

She allowed Danny to hug her and started to sob quietly. "His doctor says that the fact he hasn't woken up yet isn't a very good sign. They don't seem to think he's going to wake up anytime soon."

"Doctors have been wrong." He pointed out. "Give it some time. It's only been a week."

"I want to believe that everything will be ok." She pulled away from him and wiped the tears away. "I just…don't know what to think or feel anymore. Everything around me is changing and I don't know how to deal with that. Even if Martin does wake up, my life's never going to be the same again."

"No it isn't. But that doesn't mean that everything won't turn out ok."

She eyed him suspiciously. "You really believe that?"

"Of course." He lied with a big smile. The truth was that he didn't think anything was going to be ok—at least not anytime soon. Thoughts of alcohol and how nice it would feel to drink his problems away dominated his mind again. Even though he knew that his problems couldn't be solved with alcohol, he needed to escape. He needed to feel free, and alcohol could give him that feeling for a short time. This news of Sam's pregnancy only added huge amounts of guilt onto the massive layers of guilt he already felt.

After hearing a knock on the door, Sam got up. "Pizza's here." She moved to open the door and quickly paid the delivery guy. After paying and giving a nice tip, she looked at Danny and noticed that he was deep in thought again. He seemed like he was dealing with a lot and she realized that she needed to do something soon or he might do something he'd regret. It was obvious to her that he felt guilt over what happened to Martin and, to a certain extent, blamed himself for the shooting. To her that was ridiculous, but Danny was the kind of sensitive person who took guilt upon himself needlessly. "Hope you're hungry." She said, placing the pizza on the coffee table.

"Thanks." He replied, taking a slice.

They both ate in silence for a few minutes before Sam spoke again. "You need to stop feeling guilty about the shooting."

He looked over at her, caught off-guard by her statement. "Excuse me?"

She finished her slice and wiped her hands on a napkin. "I said, that you need to stop feeling guilty. It isn't going to help this situation and it's not what Martin would want."

Rather than admitting it, he decided to play innocent. "What makes you think I feel guilty about anything?"

She sighed. "How about the fact that you've only visited him once and that was for ten minutes at the most? Or how about the fact that your eyes give it away? Face it Taylor, I know you too well. You can't hide it from me."

He put his pizza down on a nearby napkin. "Ok, so maybe I do feel guilty about what happened. I have good reason to feel guilty though because the fact is that I…"

She chose that moment to interrupt him. "You what? Used Martin as a human shield? Shot him with your own gun? No, you didn't. You're just as much a victim in this as he is." She lowered her voice so that she wasn't yelling. "You're just luckier than he was and that's nothing to feel guilty about." Seeing that he wasn't going to say anything, she continued.

"You can turn yourself inside out thinking about what if's. Trust me, I'm the queen of what if's. What if he doesn't wake up? What if he doesn't want this child? What if the sky falls tomorrow and we're all dead? You can torture yourself with all sorts of what if's. But at the end of the day all that matters is what really happened and this is what really happened. You and Martin were ambushed; you were sitting ducks. It's a miracle that you both didn't die that night."

She really hoped that she was getting through to him. "Do you really think that Martin would want you to blame yourself for his condition? Cause I don't. If he could, he'd be here right now yelling at you too."

He sat there and took in all the words she was saying, hating the fact that she had a point. Finally, he just broke down, letting all of his guilt leave his body through his tears.

Sam watched him start to break down and gave him a hug. "Nobody blames you for anything Danny so you don't need to either."

After he was done crying, he pulled out of her embrace and gave her a small smile to show that he was better. "Thanks."

"No problem." She returned his small smile. "You've done the same for me. In times like these we have to stick together."

"Yeah, we do." He didn't say it, but he made a silent promise to look out for Sam and the baby until Martin woke up. It was the least he could do. With this new purpose he found drinking himself into oblivion less and less appealing.


	3. Three Months

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Three

**A/N: Thank you to middiegurl08, wItHouT a tRacE fReAk, thebondgirl, and jtsideout389 for your kind comments! Enjoy!**

Almost three months later

At first he didn't know what to think. Darkness surrounded him. His whole body felt numb and he was groggy. It almost felt like he was disconnected from his entire body. Opening his eyes was quite a struggle. After what seemed like forever he finally won and squinted to adjust to the bright lights. Looking to his left he noticed that he was on a bunch of machines. That meant he was in the hospital. Closing his eyes, he tried to remember what happened. The last thing he remembered was stopping at a stoplight while he was transferring Adisa Teno with Danny. Bits and pieces of the shooting finally came back to him and his eyes darted open with the recognition of what had happened to him. But what about Danny? What happened to Danny? How long has he been out of it? There were flowers all over his room, but other than that he was alone. Reaching out, he managed to hit the call button for the nurses' station. A few seconds later, a short, middle-aged woman greeted with a smile as he entered his room.

"Well hello there!" The woman greeted. "It's good to see you're awake. Are you in a lot of pain?"

He shook his head no. He was in some pain, but nothing that he couldn't endure on his own. "How long have I been out of it?"

"I'm going to go get the doctor." The nurse replied, dodging his question. "He'll be able to answer your questions much better than I can."

He was frustrated that he had to wait for the doctor in order to find out how long he had been out of it and tried to gauge how much time had passed. Looking out the window, he saw the sun was shining. Maybe it had only been a few days? He quickly turned his attention away from the window when he heard footsteps.

The doctor came into the room and stood to the side of Martin's bed. "Hello Martin. My name is Dr. Thompson. I've been monitoring your case from the beginning. How are you feeling?"

"I've been better." Martin replied sarcastically. "Do you know anything about Danny Taylor?"

Dr. Thompson thought for a moment before recognizing the name. "You mean the man who was in the shooting with you?"

"Yes. Is he ok?"

"Oh yes. He was only hit in the shoulder and is fine. He's been released for quite a while now."

"That's good." He was relieved that Danny was ok.

"Are you in any pain?" Dr. Thompson asked, looking at Martin's chart.

"Not really."

"Ok." Dr. Thompson looked up from the chart with a serious face. "Do you know what day it is?"

"No." He was very curious about what day it was and how much time had passed. "How long have I been out of it? A few days?"

"Actually, I'm afraid it's been longer than just a few days. You've been in a coma for about three months." Dr. Thompson replied.

"Three months?" He couldn't believe that he had lost that much of his life.

Dr. Thompson nodded. "Do you remember what happened to you?"

Martin just nodded, too shocked to say anything.

"You were shot three times in the chest. One of the bullets just narrowly missed your heart and the other ones penetrated your lungs. Your lungs collapsed and we didn't want to take any chances. That's why we had you on a ventilator to help you breathe. You lost a lot of blood and fell into a coma. Eventually your lungs healed enough so that we were able to take you off the ventilator, but you still remained in a coma."

"Am I going to be ok now?" He croaked out.

Dr. Thompson gave him a reassuring smile. "We'll have to run a few tests first, but I'm confident that you'll make a complete recovery."

The nurse that had come into his room earlier reentered the room. "Dr., we need you in Room 312."

"Ok." He looked back at Martin. "If you have any other questions, feel free to have me paged. And I'm sure that one of the nurses will be happy to call your family and let them know you're awake."

"Thanks." Martin nodded as Dr. Thompson left.

"My name's Hilary." The nurse smiled, walking up to Martin's bed.

"I'm Martin." He greeted. Then he realized it was stupid of him to introduce himself. She had probably been taking care of him for the past three months and already knew his name.

"Is there anyone specific you want me to call?" Hilary asked. "Like maybe your girlfriend?"

"Girlfriend?" Martin repeated. "I don't have a girlfriend anymore."

"Oh." Hilary's face showed her confusion. "I'm sorry. I just assumed that the blonde woman was your girlfriend. I mean, she was here everyday and she didn't look like she was just a friend of yours. No one worries about a friend as much as she worried about you…" She realized that she was babbling and abruptly stopped.

"She was here everyday?" This piqued his curiosity. Samantha hated hospitals and always avoided them. So why would she come by to visit everyday? Was he wrong to think that she didn't care about him? He had to make sure it was Samantha before he got his hopes up. "What does she look like?"

Hilary thought for a moment, conjuring up a mental image of Sam. "Oh blonde, kinda tall, pregnant, brown eyes…"

"Excuse me, what did you just say?" Pregnant? Sam? No, there had to be some mistake.

"Blonde?" Hilary repeated.

"No, after that."

"Brown eyes?" Hilary guessed, wondering why he was making her repeat what she had said.

"Before that." Martin instructed.

"Pregnant?" Hilary asked, still confused.

"You really think she's pregnant?" Martin asked, growing more and more confused.

"Oh I know that she's pregnant. It's very obvious." Hilary stated, finally realizing her mistake. He didn't know that his 'friend' was pregnant. "Oops. You didn't know."

"No, I didn't." Martin replied, wondering what this meant. Sam was pregnant. It couldn't be his though, right? They had stopped having sex weeks before the shooting. So did Sam hook up with someone else while he was in the coma and end up pregnant? Was she seeing someone else? And if she was, then why was she coming to visit him everyday? Nothing made sense to him. He hated the fact that he was in the coma for so long. He hated this feeling of being disconnected from his life and the people he cared about.

"Well do you want me to call her and tell her you're awake?" Hilary asked, hoping she hadn't caused any problems for anyone.

He thought about it for a moment. As much as he wanted to see Samantha right now, he wasn't sure what to think about this whole pregnancy thing. "No." He'd have her call someone else. He'd have her call Danny. "But can you please call one of my co-workers for me?

* * *

Samantha threw the last folder into her out box and sighed. She was finally done with the last bit of paperwork that Jack had assigned her. Wrapping her arms around her expanded belly, she took a moment to reflect upon the past few months. Her impending motherhood was starting to appeal to her more and more and she was slowly letting go of many of her fears about being a mother. It was tough going through this without Martin with her though and she worried about what his reaction to fatherhood would be once he woke up. 

Sighing, she looked around the bullpen. Danny and Vivian were going over a document together and looked deep in concentration. Jack was still in his office and Sofia, the team member Jack hired to temporarily replace Martin, was going over some records on her computer. Actually, it was Martin's computer at Martin's desk, but Sofia was using it right now. Samantha always had to remind herself that Martin would be back at work someday; she had to keep that hope alive.

Martin. She was still amazed by how just thinking about his name was enough to send tears to her eyes. She was getting restless and decided to go out to the balcony for some fresh air to pull herself together. Once out there, she put her arms on the railing and leaned up against it. The past three months had been hard for her, and not just because of the pregnancy. Martin was still in a coma and, with every passing day, the doctors became less optimistic about his recovery. They said that he was completely healed. The only problem was that he wasn't waking up. She still visited him every day and sometimes more than once; however, it was getting harder and harder to just sit there and wait for him to wake up.

It hadn't taken Jack too long to realize that he needed another agent that could go into the field since she was pregnant and Vivian, although she had returned to work, wasn't ready yet. So he hired Sophia. She was nice enough, but was no replacement for Martin. No one could replace him on this team. But she was good at her job and fit in with the rest of the team.

Danny was being a very good friend to her, keeping her company when she felt particularly lonely, keeping her spirits up, and letting her vent her pregnancy hormones at him. They'd have dinner together a lot and sometimes they would go visit Martin together. Vivian had been giving her tons of advise about being a mother and they usually had lunch or dinner together once a week to talk about various mother issues. Thanks to Vivian, she was starting to trust that maybe she wouldn't completely screw up the life of her child. That was a major accomplishment for her. And Jack, well Jack had been helping her by keeping her out of the field and making sure she had enough paperwork to fill her days. Everyone had been very supportive of her and this pregnancy and she appreciated it immensely. But she still wanted Martin.

She heard the door to the balcony open, followed by footsteps. She knew that he would come out here to check on her but she was fine. Without looking at Danny she said, "I just came out here for some fresh air."

He feigned an innocent look. "What? Did I say anything?"

"Not yet, but you would've." Sam laughed.

"Maybe." Danny conceded as they both leaned against the railing and looked out at the city. He had been trying to help Sam to deal with this pregnancy in anyway that he could. It had alleviated some of his guilt and pulled him back from the abyss. Before her admission, he was close to drinking again. Now though, he was coping better. He figured since Martin couldn't take care of Sam and the baby right now, he would do that for his friend. It was the least he could do.

The silence that fell started to get to her so she started to speak again. "I thought that by now I would be used to not having Martin around. I thought that I'd be ok by now, but it just keeps getting harder and harder."

"I know it's gotta be hard for you." Danny nodded, unsure of what else to say.

"I had a doctor's appointment today during my lunch hour. I almost completely lost it in the waiting room." She turned her head to look at him. "All the other women had their husbands or boyfriends with them and they were all talking about their plans forthe nursery or babynames,but I was sitting there by myself. It was really hard. I felt like I was all alone."

"You're not all alone though." He reminded her.

She nodded. "I know. I have great friends." She didn't really want to be sad anymore, so she brought up a happier subject. "I got to see the baby on the ultrasound machine. It was amazing." Her face lit up like a Christmas tree. It was an amazing moment to watch their child move around on the screen but the entire time she was thinking about how much she wanted Martin to be there with her, holding her hand as they found out the sex of the child.

"You know the sex?" Danny asked excitedly. When she nodded, he asked, "Well what is it? A boy or a girl?"

"It's a boy." Sam gushed.

"That's great news!" He gave her a quick hug. "Congratulations."

"Thanks." She replied, turning back to lean on the railing. She started to laugh.

"What's so funny?" He asked, not understanding where this recent bout of laughter came from. But it wasn't the first time she lapsed into spontaneous bouts of laughter. He had come to realize that pregnant women had very sudden mood swings.

"It's nothing, really." She shrugged. "It's just that if someone had told me six months ago that I would pregnant, and actually happy about it, I would have laughed in their faces for hours. But here I am having a baby boy and I'm actually really happy about that. I keep having this reoccurring dream where I've already given birth and I'm holding my son. Then Martin walks up to us and we become a family. In that moment, in that dream, I am completely happy."

She paused for a moment before continuing. "I never wanted to fall in love with someone and I certainly never wanted a family of my own. I pretty much laughed at Martin when I found out he wanted one."

Flashback

_They sat together in the car watching the Carroll residence. "You really think their father's in on it with them?" Sam asked.  
_

_Martin put down the binoculars. "Doesn't look like he needs any more money. He's probably just protecting his kids."  
_

_With a small chuckle Sam said, "Yeah, remind me not to have any."  
_

_With a grin, he replied, "They don't all turn out to be psychopathic kidnappers, you know."  
_

_She studied his face for a moment and then rolled her eyes. "Let me guess -- 2.2, white picket fence, golden retriever?"  
_

_His grin became wider, revealing that a family was important to him. "Yeah, maybe. Something like that."  
_

"_Not for me. Not in this world." Sam replied with a blank face. _

End Flashback

"Now look at me. Pregnant and in love." She sighed.

"It's softened you up slightly." Danny told her. "You're much more accessible now. Gone are the days of working with the Samantha Spade who only wanted to talk about work-related things. Now you're much more fun and lighter."

She rolled her eyes. "I think there was a compliment in there somewhere."

"There was." He assured her.

"So, what…" Before she could finish her sentence, Vivian came rushing out.

Vivian had a huge smile on her face, glad that she was finally able to relay some good news. "Danny! Samantha! He's awake."


	4. Who's The Father?

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Four

**A/N: Thank you middiegurl08, wItHouT a tRacE fReAk, jtsideout389 and Tea for reviewing this story! I appreciate it. Tea: Thanks for the tip on the SM board. I'll probably post this story there too in a couple of days. Enjoy!**

'He's awake.' Those were the words she had been waiting to hear for three months. Those were the words that she dreamed about hearing every night. She had thought that once he woke up she would feel nothing but happiness. But being in the elevator on the way up to Martin's room with Danny, she felt more than just happy. She felt nervous and anxious too. The elevator chime sounded and the doors opened, but she didn't get out.

Danny had already started walking but soon noticed Sam wasn't walking by his side anymore. Turning back around, he looked at her strangely. "Aren't you coming?" As soon as Vivian had told them about Martin waking up, Sam had practically run to her car in order to get to the hospital. Even though she was pregnant, she could still run pretty fast and he had trouble keeping up with her pace. She had been so eager to get to the hospital and now she was staying in the elevator. Sometimes he didn't understand pregnant women.

She stepped out of the elevator before the doors closed. "I…I'm not sure I should just waltz in there yet."

"Why not?" Danny asked, wondering what she was talking about. Seeing and talking to Martin again was all that she had wanted for months, so why was she standing out in the hallway with him instead of already being in Martin's room? Why was she delaying it? "He's going to want to see you."

"Maybe, but maybe not." Sam reminded him. "The last time we spoke to each other it was awkward and barely civil."

"He loves you though." Danny reassured her. "Trust me, he'll want to see you."

"But what about this?" She pointed to her belly. "As soon as I step foot in his room, he's going to realize that I'm pregnant. Is that really something that he should find out like that? He's just found out that he's lost three months of his life. Do you honestly think that this pregnancy is something that he should find out about right now? It would be quite a shock."

"Well someone has to tell him eventually." Danny reasoned. "It's going to be a shock no matter when you choose to tell him."

"I know, but…" she stopped herself. "I'm not making any sense, am I?"

He put his hands on her shoulders, finally understanding what the real problem was. "You're making total sense to me. You're nervous about talking to him, aren't you?"

"Maybe." She nodded.

"Don't be. Everything's going to be fine. But since you're so worried, why don't follow me into him room and hide behind me?"

She laughed, grateful to him for helping to erase her anxiety with humor. "You really think you can provide camouflage for me? I'm huge! I'd never be able to hide behind you."

"You're not that huge…yet." He smirked. Looking around, he found an alternative to having her hide behind him. "Here we go." He walked over to the nurse's station and grabbed a large floral arrangement. "Just hold this in front of your belly. It will hide the fact that you're pregnant."

"That's ridiculous!" Sam exclaimed, reluctantly taking the floral arrangement from him. "Do you really expect this to work?"

"Yes. Don't you ever watch soap operas on TV? They do this type of thing all the time when filming those shows." He explained. Seeing the confused look on her face, he decided to explain in greater detail. "If one of the actresses gets pregnant and they don't want to write it into the show they just stick her behind furniture or give her something big to hold in front of herself. Usually it's a shopping bag, purse, or sometimes a big hat, but this will do on such short notice."

She raised her eyebrow and looked at him like he had grown a second head. "How is it that you know all of this about soap operas?"

He laughed nervously and shrugged. "It's just something I seemed to have picked up somewhere along the way. Anyway, are you coming or not?"

She was going to give him a hard time about watching soap operas, but she wanted to see Martin. "Fine. I'm coming." She relented with one last laugh at Danny, following him to Martin's room. She let Danny enter the room first, preferring to take a few deep breaths and arrange the floral arrangement so that her belly wasn't showing.

Martin smiled when he saw Danny enter his room. "It's good to see you."

"Not as good as it is for me to see you." Danny smiled back as he approached Martin's bed. "How are you doing?"

"Ok I guess considering I have no idea what's happened these past few months." Martin replied, taking a good look at Danny. "So you're ok?"

"Me?" Danny asked. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just got clipped in the shoulder."

"Well, care to fill me in on what I've missed? How's Viv?"

"She's fine. She actually came back to work well-rested about a month and a half ago. She can't go out into the field yet, but she's content doing paperwork for now." As Danny answered Martin's question he wondered where Sam was. She had been right behind him.

"How's Jack doing?" Martin asked, glad to hear that Viv was doing better.

"He's…well he's Jack. Still moody as always." They shared a laugh at that comment. Danny noticed that Martin was bringing up every subject except Sam. It was almost like he didn't even want to talk about her.

"So have you had any interesting cases lately?"

"Not really." Danny replied, still wondering why Samantha hadn't come into the room yet. He also wondered why Martin hadn't asked about Samantha. He finally got tired of tip-toeing around that subject. "You know, Martin, she's been really worried about you."

"Who?" Martin asked innocently, pretending that he didn't know who Danny was talking about.

Danny gave him a stern look. "You know who I'm talking about. Samantha. She really cares about you a lot. The past few months have been hard on her."

"Yeah I bet." He replied sarcastically.

"I know that you two weren't on very good speaking terms earlier, but what's with this bad attitude toward her?" Danny asked.

"Oh I don't know." Martin sighed. "Maybe it's because she's pregnant."

Danny looked at Martin strangely. How did Martin know that Sam was pregnant? Who told him? And why did he seem so angry about it? "Who told you about that?"

"One of the nurses told me." Martin replied.

"Oh." He wasn't sure why Martin was acting this way towards Sam, but he soon realized what the problem was. "Oh, I get it now." Martin must not have found out the whole truth. He'd be in a better mood once he found out that he was the father. A smile formed on his face. "Did the nurse tell you who the father was?"

"Is it anyone I know?" Martin asked, quietly adding, "Please tell me it isn't Jack." He couldn't handle it if Sam got back together with Jack. That would destroy him.

Danny laughed at his comment, which earned him a dirty look from Martin.

"What?" Martin exclaimed. "That's not funny Danny."

"No you're wrong." Danny laughed. "That's actually the funniest thing I've heard in a really long time. Seriously though, you actually think Sam would…or Jack would for that matter? It's ridiculous."

His curiosity was starting to get the better of him. "So who is the father then? A one-night stand that never called her again? A boyfriend that dumped her? Has she been going through this by herself? And why is she even keeping this baby? I thought she didn't want children."

"Well, actually…" Danny was about to answer Martin's questions when he heard the door open. Without turning around he knew it was Sam. Why did she pick now to come in? All he needed was a few more seconds to tell Martin the truth.

Sam slowly entered the room, trying to make sure that the floral arrangement Danny gave her was positioned directly in front of her belly. "Hi." She greeted with a smile, unable to take her eyes off of Martin. It had been so long since she'd been able to see his beautiful blue eyes; all she wanted to do was stare into them forever.

"Hi." He replied softly. It was nice to see her again. She was holding some kind of floral arrangement in her hands, almost like she was hiding her pregnancy. She was also staring at him. While he was glad to see her, he couldn't help but feel hurt that she seemed to have moved on without him.

Danny looked back and forth between the two of them, wondering what the best course of action would be for this situation. He turned towards Sam, who had gone to stand at the foot of Martin's bed. "Um, Sam, I think the jig is up. You can put the flowers down. He knows."

"What?" Shock and a slight look of terror flashed across her face at the recognition of Danny's words. Then she felt slightly angry with Danny. "Why did you tell him? I thought that I told you not to tell him."

He held his hands up in defeat. "Hey, I didn't say anything to him. Apparently one of the nurses told him."

Sam sighed and put the flowers on a nearby table. Ok, so he knew. That wasn't the worst thing in the world that could've happened. She walked over to the other side of Martin's bed. Not looking at Martin, she spoke to Danny. "How much does he know?"

"Not much." Danny replied. "He did wonder who the father was though."

"You know, I am still in the room!" Martin exclaimed, surprised by how big Sam had gotten. The nurse was right. It was obvious that Sam was pregnant. Sadness reigned in his heart as he realized that her pregnancy probably signified a new life that she was building without him. She wasn't his anymore; he had made sure of that by dumping her. A part of him wasn't sure he wanted to know who the father was anymore. He was afraid that he didn't want to know. At least he could find solace in the fact that Jack wasn't the father.

"Sorry." Sam apologized. She clasped her hands together and stared down at them. "I guess since you know about the pregnancy, it's time to tell you who the father is." It was time to tell him, no matter what his reaction would be. "So, well, the father is…you. Martin, you're the father."

'Martin, you're the father.' Wow. He hadn't expected that. This was almost as shocking as finding out that he was in a coma for three months. Sam was pregnant with his child? How? When? Why? Questions swirled around in his head.

Of course certain things started to make sense, like why Sam would come to visit him everyday. But for the most part, he was confused and shocked. Did she want this child? Did she hate him for getting her pregnant? She had always told him that she didn't want a family. So why hadn't she just gotten an abortion when she found out? Was she happy about this? Was he happy about this? What did this mean for their relationship? Could they have a relationship? Although he had always wanted a family of his own, was now the right time for it?

Ok so maybe he didn't really have a choice about the timing. Judging from the size of Sam's belly, she looked to be at least five months into the pregnancy and maybe more. But what did this mean for their relationship? He broke up with her and they were barely speaking to each other. Now to find out that they're having a child together is quite a shock. Does she want him to be a part of this child's life? All of these endless questions gave him a headache.

"Ok, I'm gonna leave now and let you two talk." Danny announced, giving Sam once last smile for encouragement before turning to Martin. "I can't tell you how glad everyone is to have you awake again. I'm sure Jack and Vivian will be by later to see you." When Martin simply nodded to show that he heard Danny's words, Danny turned to leave. "Play nicely children." He said before leaving.

So it was then just her and Martin left in the room—along with their child. She let him have a few minutes to absorb this new information, but after about ten minutes of silence she became impatient. What did his silence mean? Was he just that shocked or was he trying to figure out a way to tell her that he wanted nothing to do with her? "Aren't you going to say something?"

"Like what?" He replied, staring out at the wall in front of him. He was still just trying to process all of the information that had been thrown at him.

"Anything." She bit her lip. This wasn't the way she had envisioned this scene going in her head. Maybe she had been naïve, but she had always thought that he would be overjoyed to find out that he was going to be a father. He had mentioned that he wanted kids and a family of his own someday. But maybe that wasn't the problem. Maybe the problem wasn't that he was going to be the father but that she was going to be the mother of his child. She knew that she loved him. She knew that she wanted a family with him, and she wouldn't want anyone else to be the father of her child, but did he want? Was there any chance of getting back together?

"What do you want me to say?" Martin finally asked.

She sighed, not liking the way this conversation was going. "I don't know Martin." He didn't reply so she continued. "I'm sorry you had to find out this way. I didn't want to spring this on you so soon after you woke up. I know it's a shock. It was a shock when I found out."

"When did you find out?" He asked, finally looking at her. Did she know about it before the shooting and hide that from him?

"I had my suspicions but I didn't find out for sure until the night of the shooting." She explained.

It helped him to know that she hadn't kept this a secret from him. "So what does all of this mean?"

"I don't know." She replied, unable to stop the tears that were forming. She was stupid to believe that he would be happy about this child and immediately embrace her back into his life. "I guess it depends on what you want."

"What I want." He echoed her words. "A few months ago we could barely have a civil conversation that lasted for more than thirty seconds. We had broken up Sam. Now I find out that we're having a child. It's a lot to take in."

"I realize that." She nodded. "I've had a lot more time to deal with this pregnancy than you have. Maybe I should go and let you have some time."

"I think that's a good idea." He didn't mean for that comment to sound harsh, but it did and he watched as she flinched at his tone.

She didn't want to leave him; she never wanted to leave him again. But she realized that he was dealing with a lot and needed time to himself. Still, there was something about his tone of voice though that made her feel like this situation was hopeless. "I really am glad that you're awake."

He didn't say anything to her until she reached the door. "Hey, Samantha?"

She turned around to face him, hoping that he'd say something encouraging to her before she left. "Yeah?"

He had wanted to tell her that he still cared about her, or maybe just thank her for coming, but he hesitated. "Nothing."

She tried to hide her disappointment that he didn't say anything to her. Not a 'thanks for coming by', 'it's good to see you', or anything. He didn't even ask about the baby. She wanted desperately to believe that he was just overwhelmed by everything, but she didn't know what to believe anymore. On the walk back to the elevator, she found Danny standing there. "I thought you went home."

"The tension in that room was very thick. I thought you might want to talk about it when you two were done talking." He explained, adding a touch of his special humor. "Besides, you were my ride here and I didn't want to spend money on a cab."

She gave him a small smile. "There's nothing to talk about." They entered the elevator together after the doors opened. "It was awkward and tense. I don't think he wants to have anything to do with me or this child."

Danny wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "I don't believe that for a second. He's just dealing with a lot. Be patient and I'm sure he'll be ecstatic about this baby."

"Maybe." She shrugged her shoulders. "But he didn't seem too happy right now."

"Just give it some time." Danny replied. He knew that Martin's reaction was a major disappointment to Sam, but he knew Martin. It might take him a while to get past the initial shock of everything that has happened since he entered his coma, but once he snaps out of it he'll be excited.


	5. Three Options

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Five

**A/N: Many thanks to jtsideout389, Broni, Lu78, and SuperKelli85 for your kind reviews! Broni- Yes I have posted this at the Martin/Samantha fanfictionarchive. I just have a different user name there. Enjoy!**

Martin laid his head back on the pillow and stared out the window. The sun had finished setting and the moon was starting to rise. He took this time to reflect over the last few hours. Jack and Vivian came by two hours ago and stayed for a while. It was good to see Vivian was doing well and Jack, well Jack was still the same. He knew that they wanted to ask him about his thoughts concerning Samantha and the baby, but fortunately they were polite and didn't bring it up.

Samantha and the baby. He still couldn't believe that she was pregnant—and he especially couldn't believe it was his child. He had never expected Sam to ever have children. It was so out of character for her. It was only now, hours later that it was starting to sink in that he was going to be a father.

He's always wanted children and a family of his own. But he always pictured himself getting married first and, although for a while he had thought Sam could be a part of that dream, he never truly believed she would. That was one of the reasons he broke up with her in the first place. He didn't think she was serious about their relationship. She wouldn't even tell the rest of the office about their relationship. Now though, now she was having his child.

So where did they stand? Sure they are having a child together, but could they have a second chance? Does she want one? Did he? Did he still love her? The answer to the last question was yes. He did still love her. But does she love him and would love be enough to keep them together? Would it be worth the risk of getting hurt again? His thoughts went back to a conversation he had earlier with one of the nurses.

Flashback

_Jack and Vivian left his room only minutes ago but Martin was already bored. Looking around, he noticed his room had a TV, but the remote was too far away for him to reach. Frustrated, he pressed the call button for a nurse. _

"_Hello Martin." A short, middle-aged woman greeted with a smile as he entered his room. "What can I do for you? Pain medication? Something to eat or drink?" _

_He remembered this nurse's name was Hilary and returned her smile. "Actually, can you just hand me the TV remote please?" Martin asked. _

"_Sure." Hilary reached over and handed the remote to him._

_He took the remote and placed it on the bed. Then he looked up at Hilary. _

"_Anything else?" She asked in a pleasant tone. _

_He hesitated for a moment, contemplating whether or not to ask. "Actually, could I ask you a question about something?" _

"_Sure. Go ahead. What do you want to know?" Before he had a chance to answer, she interrupted him. " I must warn you though, if you're hoping I've been watching CSI or something and can tell you what's happened, you're gonna be disappointed because I don't watch much TV." _

_He chuckled. "I don't watch much either. It's not about television." _

"_World news? Politics?" She guessed in a joking manner. "Sports?" _

"_No. It's a little more personal than that." He shook his head. "I wanted to ask you about…"_

_Hilary interrupted, knowing what he really wanted to ask. "The blonde?" _

"_Yeah." Martin nodded. "How'd you guess?" _

_"Women's intuition." She smirked. "You're curious about how much time she spent here, how she acted while she here, and that kind of thing. Am I right?"_

_He felt sheepish about asking this, but he did want to know. He felt like he had a right to know. "Yes." _

_Hilary gave him a sympathetic smile. "In the beginning, she was here almost twenty-four hours a day. She pretty much lived at your bedside, except for going to work of course. Then as time went by she started coming by less. Usually she would come by around noon, probably on her lunch break. She'd stay here for about an hour and then she'd come back for a few hours in the evening. Either myself of one of the other nurses on duty_ _would often catch her sitting by your bed with her head draped across your chest fast asleep." She paused, letting him take in what she had told him. "That's why I assumed she was your girlfriend. No one worries about a friend as much as she worried about you. I've been a nurse to many comatose patients before, and I've seen a lot of things. I've seen people here purely out of guilt, and I've seen people here out of devotion. I know what love looks like and she's definitely in love." _

_He wasn't sure what to think about Sam staying here so much. Her dedication to staying here went far above and beyond the normal confines of friendship. But did she really want him or did she just feel guilty? He knew it was weird, but he almost felt glad that she had spent so much time sitting with him while he was out of it. It most likely wasn't entertaining for her, but she stayed here anyway—even though she hates hospitals. That had to count for something, right?_

"_Thanks for telling me." He managed a small smile.  
_

"_It's no problem." Hilary replied, hoping she helped. She was a fairly intuitive person and she could tell that these two people loved each other. A hopeless romantic at heart, she always rooted for love._

End of flashback

Thinking back on Sam's visit, he started to feel badly about the way he acted. She was probably expecting a different reaction from him and he acted coldly towards her. After all, she had been waiting for him to wake up for three months and the first thing he did once he was awake was be a jerk to her. She's had to go through this pregnancy without him and he didn't even ask one question about the progress of the baby's growth. He didn't mean to make it seem like he wasn't interested in the development of their child, but with everything that he was going through it was hard for him to put on a happy face and pretend everything was fine.

Everything wasn't fine. Ever since he woke up earlier today he was confronted with changes. It felt like everything in his life had changed and nothing would ever be the same. Still, that was no excuse to be rude to Sam. He was a better person than that.

With a sigh, he reached over and picked up the phone. He knew what he had to do.

As he dialed her number, he still had no idea what exactly he'd say to her. He only knew that he needed to talk to her.

Sam heard the phone start to ring and sighed. She had gotten home from having dinner with Danny only a few minutes ago and wasn't sure she wanted to talk to anyone. Today was emotionally exhausting. After the fifth ring she decided to take a chance and answer the phone. "Spade."

Once she picked up the phone he became speechless, lapsing into silence.

"Hello? Anyone there?" She really wasn't in the mood for any games. If this was a wrong number they should just hang up. She was about to hang up for them when she heard a familiar voice.

"Hey, it's me." Martin finally spoke.

As soon as she heard his voice on the other end, she got nervous. Why was he calling her? "Martin, hi. Are you ok?"

He considered her question for a moment. Deciding to answer it truthfully, he replied, "Yes and no."

His answer worried her. "Is something wrong?"

"I just feel bad about what happened earlier." He felt the need to explain further. "I didn't handle things very well."

While she appreciated the fact that he would admit that to her, she didn't think it was necessary. "Oh. Don't worry about it. You're dealing with a lot right now."

"That's no excuse, but thanks." He smiled because the awkwardness and tension that was around earlier seemed to be gone. "We need to talk about this."

"I know," she bit her lip, "and we'll talk about it as soon as you feel ready. There's no rush. Take your time."

He hesitated for a moment. "I think I'm ready to talk now, if that's ok."

She was surprised by this, but rebounded well. In the back of her mind she had expected him to take a few days to think things through and get readjusted to his life. The fact that he wanted to talk about everything now was confusing to her. Was that a good sign or a bad one? "Um, ok."

"Are you busy right now?" He asked. Looking at the clock he saw it was only seven p.m. "Could you stop by the hospital? I don't think this is something we should be talking about over the phone."

She was exhausted and had intended on going straight to bed, but couldn't refuse the invitation to see him again. Just being in the same room as him was enough to lift her spirits, especially now that he was awake. The months of going to his hospital room only to be alone were over. "I'll be right over."

"Good. So I'll see you soon." After he hung up, he started planning what he would say to her when she stopped by.

* * *

For the second time that day, Samantha stood outside Martin's door. This time, she was even more nervous than the first. He had said that he wanted to talk about the situation they were in, but had no idea if the conversation was going to only be about the baby or if they could talk about getting back together. Would he want that? Or would he want to just make sure that he secured a place in his child's life? She hoped they could find a way to start again, but didn't want to get her hopes up too high. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door and gave him a smile. "Hi." 

"Hi." He smiled back, watching her as she entered his room. Unlike the first time she had come by, he took the time to examine her carefully. Other than her now-rounded belly and a few dark circles around her eyes, she was basically the same. Even though he didn't have any recollection of the past few months while he was out, he still felt like he missed her.

She sat in the chair that was sitting next to his bed and recalled the months that she had spent in the chair, just staring at him and willing him to wake up. If this had been a normal visit, she would be telling him about everything that had happened since she had left him. Now that he was awake she didn't know what to do or what to say. Baring her soul to him was a lot easier when he was in a coma.

"I…" They both started to speak at the same time. After they shared a laugh, she spoke again. "You can go first if you want."

"You sure?" He asked, watching her nod. "Ok. I was just going to say that I'm glad you came back tonight."

She gave him a small smile. "Well you called so I came running," she amended her statement, "well not actually running. I drove, but you get the point." She was aware that she was rambling because she was nervous and tried to calm herself down. This was just Martin. That thought both calmed her and made her feel more anxious at the same time.

Her choice of words intrigued him. So all he had to do is call and she'd come running? What had happened to her in the past couple of months? She had obviously changed physically, but had she changed in other ways? "I'd like to apologize about earlier…"

"I already told you that it's ok." She interrupted. "I understand. You were overwhelmed."

"It's just a lot to take in. I'm gonna be a father. We're gonna be parents." He stared at her belly.

She smiled as he stared at her and bit her lip. "It's a boy."

"A boy?" He smiled and locked eyes with her. Wow. He was having a son. "That's great. I mean, I would have loved to have a girl too, but a boy is just as great." He once again felt guilty for not being there for her. "I wish I had been there from the beginning."

"Me too." She replied quietly. "But Danny's been really supportive. He's been a really good friend to me and Vivian's been a lifesaver too. She's really helped me quite a lot. I don't think I would have made it this far without them."

"That's good." He nodded. "At least you haven't had to go through this alone." He absentmindedly looked at his hand. He would have felt really guilty if she had been going through this alone. It was bad enough that he wasn't around but at least they had great friends around them. "You do know that if I hadn't gotten shot I would have been there for you and this child, right? I mean I know that we weren't exactly getting along very well but I still would have…"

Feeling bold, she reached out and grabbed his hand, giving it a squeeze. "I know."

As soon as their fingers touched, he felt the same electric energy that had helped facilitate their prior relationship. The chemistry was still there and he knew that she felt it too. He considered pulling his hand away but couldn't bring himself to do it. He'd been without any real human contact for too long. "You've had a lot more time to get adjusted to this."

"Yeah, I have." She nodded. "It's ok if your scared about this…at least that's what Viv keeps telling me."

He looked up at her. He knew that he was petrified, but it was hard to believe that Samantha Spade was scared of anything. "You're scared too?" Was he ready to be someone's father? That was a huge responsibility and while he wanted to be a father, his insecurities screamed that perhaps he wasn't ready.

"Terrified," she stated plainly, "and the farther along I get, the more scared I seem to become." Her eyes started to tear up. "I start thinking, am I ready for this? Can I do this? How am I going to raise this child without screwing him up? Things like that. Viv says that normal and that she went through the same thing. I doubt that sometimes though. She's such a wonderful mother. She practically oozes maternal instinct." With the hand that wasn't connected to Martin's she wiped the tears from her eyes, then looked at him with a small smile. "Sorry. Pregnancy hormones make me really sensitive. A few days ago I started bawling because I was out of milk."

He laughed softly, glad for her infusion of some humor into their deep conversation. "So being scared is normal? I'm glad. I don't like being abnormal."

She wanted to ask if he wanted this child, but didn't have the courage. What if he said no? Or he could lie and say yes when in reality he didn't want to have a child with her.

He let silence reign in the room while he collected his thoughts and let Samantha drift away into deep thought. A few minutes later he started to speak again. He had come up with a plan to test her after he invited her over. "So what are our options?"

"Options?" She was confused. What did he mean by options?

"Yeah, options." He explained further. "The way I see it, we only have a couple of options on how to deal with this situation. First option is we get joint custody."

"You mean pass the child back and forth from your apartment to mine?" She didn't like that idea, basically because it didn't involve them being a real family. The fact that this was his first option made her believe that he wanted this baby in his life, but not her and she didn't like that. "Is that really such a good idea?"

"No, but it is an option that we should at least acknowledge." He didn't really like that idea either; he was just testing her to see what she wanted. So far, it seemed like she wasn't interested in joint custody. That was a good sign. "It's something to keep in mind."

She soon became curious. "So what's the second option?"

"We could get a bigger apartment and move in together. That way we would both be there to witness every important and unimportant moment."

A smile came to her face. Move in together? Raise their son together? Be a family? This was exactly what she wanted.

He could see the smile on her face and decided to test her again by saying, "We'd be two friends raising a child together."

When he said that though, the smile on her face fell and she felt immediate sadness. There was that dreaded 'f' word. Friends. To her it was the worst word in the world. Why had she been so stupid before? Why couldn't she have realized that he was the one she wanted to spend the rest of her life with months ago and opened up more? Would that have made any difference? Or would they have still ended up in this situation anyway?

Watching the smile on her face fall once he said the word 'friends', he repressed the smile that was trying to form on his face. He knew it was slightly mean, but he had decided to do a little experiment with Sam. He would try to guess what her feelings were based on what he suggested they do about the baby. And judging by the look on her face when he suggested that they would be only friends, maybe Hilary was right and Sam did have feelings for him. Maybe Sam did want a real relationship with him.

She had seemed really happy with his second option of moving in together until he said that they would be strictly friends. Then the smile left her face and she looked like she had been hit by a wrecking ball. So what exactly did that mean? Did she want something more? It seemed like she did. But what did she want from him? A proposal? Some kind of commitment? Move in together? Get back together? And what did he want?

He had been thinking about that a lot since he woke up and still hadn't come up with a final answer. He knew that he was in love with her and that he wanted both her and their son in his life. But in what capacity? As a husband and father? A boyfriend and father? A friend and father?

She had been thinking about how he said that they could live together as friends and raise this child. While she wanted more than that, she wouldn't be greedy. If that was the only way to be really close to him and have him be a part of their child's life then maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. "Is that what you want to do?" She finally asked.

"Don't forget that there's a third option." He informed her, feeling bad about putting her through this test. Her reaction to the third option was the most important part of this test. Her reaction would tell him everything he needed to know—or at least he hoped it would.

"Ok. What's the third option?" She sighed, not sure if she wanted to know. The first option was joint custody, the second was raising the child as friends. So what was left for the third option? Did he want to raise the child by himself and leave her out of the picture?

"We could move in together, raise the baby together, and try to work out our relationship problems."


	6. So Are We?

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Six

**A/N: Thank you Lu78, wItHouT a tRacE fReAk, jtsideout389 and Jenn for your kind reviews! It helps to know that people are liking this story as much as I like writing it. Enjoy!**

"We could move in together, raise the baby together, and try to work out our relationship problems." He then waited to watch her reaction to that. She seemed to be shocked, and for a moment he wondered if suggesting that they get back together was a bad idea.

She opened her mouth to say something but found that she was speechless. To tell the truth, she hadn't expected him to say anything like that. She honestly thought that he would be dead-set against any type of reconciliation and that she would have to convince him to give her a second chance. But his option number three seemed to prove her wrong. Maybe he wanted her back after all. After gaining control of her vocal cords again, she asked, "Are you serious about trying to work on our relationship?"

"Would I joke about something like that?" He countered, keeping his eyes fixated on her as she stood up and walked over to the window. She was keeping her back to him so he couldn't see her face. He had no idea what she was thinking, and that scared him a little.

She stared out the window, desperately trying to maintain any semblance of control over her emotions. So many thoughts and feelings were swirling around in her head that it was hard for her to focus on just one of them.

He hadn't expected her to be so quiet. Once again he wondered if he had made a mistake. "Are you going to stare out the window all night?" Maybe he shouldn't have listened to Hilary, after all, she didn't know Sam and she knew nothing about their past relationship.

Sam thought about turning around to face him but knew that if she did, she would completely fall apart and she needed to be able to get this out while she still had the courage to do it. So she kept her back to him and stared absent-mindedly out the window. "I'm not sure I deserve your forgiveness or another chance."

Her statement caught him off-guard. "Why not?"

"I think we both know why not. Martin. As much as it hurt me at the time, I realize that you were right to break up with me. I was horrible to you. I pushed you away, I didn't let you in, and I was terribly selfish." She could feel the tears start flowing from her eyes again and quietly sobbed. "I refused to let anyone we knew find out about our relationship when I really should've been shouting about it from the rooftops because I had this wonderfully amazing guy that treated me with nothing but respect and thoughtfulness. But I made the mistake of thinking that I was the only one that mattered in the relationship. I made the relationship all about me and what I wanted, never considering your feelings."

While he was glad that she was starting to see why the reasons why he broke up with her, it killed him to see her crying about it. He wanted to be able to take the pain away from her. Since he wasn't able to get out of bed and wrap his arms around her, words had to suffice. "It's ok."

"No it's not." She smiled. "But thanks anyway." It was just like him to be nice and say that the way she treated him was ok. "I've had a lot of time to think about what went wrong in our relationship and why it didn't work out. I realize that the blame falls on me. I wanted to control everything. I thought that if I kept you at arms length, if I didn't open up my heart and mind to you, then I wouldn't fall in love with you."

He had always known that she was scared of falling in love—with anyone. It was definitely a good sign that she was starting to realize it too. "Would that have really been so bad?" He asked.

"No," she shook her head, "but that's not what I thought then. Every guy in my life that I loved, or even thought I loved, has left me at some point. Back then I thought that I could control my feelings and not fall in love with you because then I wouldn't get hurt." She released a sniffle and dried the tears from her cheeks.

He didn't know if he should ask this, but did anyway. "And now?"

"Now, I realize I have no choice. I can't control who I love any more than I can stop the sun from rising and setting." She turned around and her eyes slowly drifted up from the floor to meet his. "And I love you Martin. I've loved you all along; I was just stupid enough to deny it to myself."

So she did love him! He had been waiting a long time to hear those words and was so happy to hear them that he wanted to jump out of his bed and start dancing. But of course he couldn't do that, so he focused on Sam again. Motioning to the chair that she had been sitting in before, he said, "Come and sit down."

She hesitated before moving to the chair, unsure of why he wanted her to sit.

Once she was sitting down, he took her hand in his and brought it up to his lips for a soft kiss. "Do you know how long I've waited for you to say that?"

She shook her head and a small smile formed. "I'm so sorry for everything that I put you through."

"It's forgiven." He smiled. "Do you think we can start again?" He asked, hoping that she would say yes.

"I want to, but what about you?" She sighed. "Are you sure that you want to get into a relationship with me again?"

"I'm sure because I love you Samantha. Always have and always will." With that, he gave her one of his special smiles.

She smiled back at him after hearing that he loved her and stared at his smile. That was the smile that she had been waiting so long to see again. It was that special smile that he saved for only her. It was the type of smile that always warmed her heart and could cheer her up whenever she was feeling bad. How could she have been so stupid to push him away and not embrace her feelings for him? Why did it take her so long to realize that loving him wasn't a horrible idea? Would things have been different if they hadn't broken up?

She squeezed his hand. "So are we…?"

He squeezed her hand back. "Yeah, I think we are."

Her heart felt like it would explode. At that moment she had never been happier. All of her dreams were coming true. She had Martin and their child. She had a family. Who would have guessed that she would be so happy at the thought of being a part of a real family?

"I think that we should take things relatively slowly though—see where this takes us."

"Ok. I understand." She wanted so badly to reach over and kiss him, but wasn't sure if it was too soon to do that. He had just finished saying that they were supposed to be taking their new relationship slow, but just how slow where they going to go?

He seemed to realize her hesitation because he soon said, "So what does a guy have to do around here to get a kiss? I woke up from a coma. Isn't that enough?"

She laughed and rolled her eyes before leaning in and giving him a slow, passionate kiss. After a few minutes of kissing, she finally pulled back to get some air. As she looked at the clock, she started to groan because she had to work the next day. "I don't want to, but I really should go. It's getting late and I have to work tomorrow."

"It is getting late." He agreed, looking at the clock. While he understood that she needed to leave, he was selfish and didn't want her to go. Without thinking, he asked, "why don't you stay here tonight?"

She laughed. "Because this chair is not comfortable. I'll wake up with kinks in my neck and a bad back ache."

"I could scoot over some and you could sleep up here with me." He patted one side of the bed.

She couldn't believe what he was offering. He wanted her to sleep with him in his hospital bed? Just the thought of being able to sleep next to him was enough to send her heart racing. "Well, I don't want to crowd you."

"You wouldn't." He looked at the bed, examining it. "I think the bed is big enough."

"Are you sure about this?" She really didn't want to move too quickly and didn't want to hurt him. A kiss was one thing, but staying here with him was an entirely different thing.

"I'm sure." He could tell that she was hesitating and wondered if this was a bad idea considering that they had just agreed to take things slowly. He hadn't planned asking her to stay and hadn't thought this through. He just sort of blurted it out. But it felt right. He had missed having her sleep next to him and being able to wrap his arms around her.

She bit her lip and thought about it for a moment. "Ok, but only as long as I'm not hurting you."

"You won't." Martin assured her as he scooted over and made room for her. Watching as she carefully climbed onto the bed, he put his arm around her and pulled her closer to him so that her head was resting on his right shoulder.

"I'm not hurting you, am I?" She asked, surprised that he had put his arm around her and pulled her closer.

"Nope." He shifted to the side to give her a little more room. "Are you comfortable?"

"Yeah." It felt really good to be in his arms again. She had almost forgotten just how euphoric his embrace was. Being in his arms again made her feel like she was floating in heaven.

"Please don't be mad at me, but I have to confess something."

That didn't sound good. "What do you have to confess?"

"I, well, earlier I was sort of testing you." Martin explained. "I was testing you with that list of options. I used you reactions to gauge whether or not you truly cared about me or not."

She was confused, and only slightly angry. "You were just testing me?"

"Yes." He nodded. "Believe me, I didn't want joint custody or moving in together just as friends either. I was just seeing what your reaction to that was so that I would be able to tell how receptive you'd be to getting back together."

"But why did you have to test me?" This still made no sense to her. She had been visiting him everyday since the shooting and was certain that the nurses had told him about that. After all, the nurses had already taken it upon themselves to tell him about her pregnancy. So she naturally assumed that they had told him about how many times she visited him. Why was it so hard for him to believe that she cared about him?

"I don't know." He sighed. "I just didn't want to get my hopes up."

That explanation made sense to her. She was the queen of not wanting to get her hopes up. She sighed, letting any residual anger she felt about being tricked go as she exhaled. "Well I guess I can't really be mad at you for that."

"You can't?" He couldn't believe that she wasn't angry with him. Maybe she really had changed.

"No. Just please don't trick me like that again?" She asked.

"Ok, I won't." He was glad that they weren't going to fight about it, and surprised that she wasn't angry with him. But he wasn't going to complain about it.

"Martin?"

"Yeah Sam?" He asked, stifling a yawn.

She grabbed a hold of his hand and gave it a tight squeeze. "I missed you a lot, even before the shooting."

"I missed you too." He replied, brushing a few strands of hair from her face. "But now we don't have to miss each other anymore because I don't plan on ever letting you go again."

She smiled at his comment. "That's certainly good to hear." After a couple moments of silence, she said, "I love you."

His hand moved to rest on her stomach. "I love you too." He had missed having her in his arms and was suddenly really glad for his earlier sudden outburst of inviting her to stay. Tightening his hold of her, the only thoughts on his brain were of how much he loved her and how excited he was about the future. "Goodnight Samantha."

"Goodnight Martin."

Soon after, he could hear her breathing become even and knew that she had fallen asleep. After kissing the top of her head, he let himself fall asleep. Maybe having everything change wasn't going to be such a bad thing after all.


	7. Home Sweet Home

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Seven

**A/N: Thank you to jtsideout389 and wItHouT a tRacE fReAk for your reviews! Enjoy!**

A Week Later

Martin released a sigh as he turned off his television. He was growing more and more anxious to leave the hospital. After bugging his doctor for days, the doctor had finally agreed to release him today and he was beyond grateful. He was sick of this hospital; he'd spent entirely too long lying in this bed, dwelling on the amount of time that he had missed. He still couldn't believe that he had lost three whole months of his life. That was time that he was never going to get back. Even worse was the fact that he had missed almost all of Sam's pregnancy. While he was glad that Danny and their friends were there for her, he couldn't help but feel left out and completely out of the loop.

Not wanting to continue thinking about the aftermath of the shooting, he switched to a more pleasant topic—his new relationship with Samantha. Throughout the past week she had been coming over constantly to check up on him and to talk. They had talked a little bit about the past and cleared the air on a lot of things. But usually they would talk about an interesting case at work, something baby-related, or they would just sit there and make random comments about whatever was on TV. So far, their relationship was going well.

She hadn't stayed the night with him again since that first night, but he suspected it was because she wasn't comfortable being squished together in his hospital bed. He understood that she needed space to stretch out, but wished she would stay anyway. That first night, when she was with him, he slept wonderfully. But since then, he had been having horrible nightmares about the shooting. The dreams were so realistic and gory that it was getting to the point that he didn't want to go to sleep anymore without her next to him. She seemed to be his own personal dream catcher.

Danny came bursting through the door with a huge smile on his face. "Hey Marty, ready to break free of this place?"

Martin gave him a smile. "You bet." Danny had been a great friend, coming and visiting him a lot this past week. He would come by with a notepad and start rattling off random news stories that had occurred while he was in the coma. He brought him up to speed on politics, movies, music, general news, and most importantly sports. While he was glad to see Danny, he couldn't help being slightly disappointed that Sam hadn't come to pick up him up from the hospital.

"Great. Then I'll go get your release papers while you get dressed." With that said, he left Martin's room.

* * *

About twenty-five minutes later, Danny was driving Martin back to his apartment. They stopped at a red light and Martin looked over at Danny. With a chuckle he said, "I wonder how much dust and mail has piled up at my apartment." Then he started to wonder. "Do I even have an apartment anymore? I mean, I haven't paid my rent in three months. Did I get evicted?" The thought that he would be without an apartment hadn't occurred to him until now and it concerned him. 

"No, you didn't get evicted." Danny chuckled and gave his friend a smile. "Don't worry man, you still have an apartment."

As Danny pushed the gas pedal once the stoplight turned green, Martin contemplated what his friend was saying. So he still had an apartment? But how? He hadn't been paying his rent. "And just how is that possible?"

While he wasn't sure he should be the one to tell him this, he couldn't find a way around it. "She didn't want me to tell you this, but Sam's been paying your rent and everything for you."

"She's what?" He couldn't believe it. "Can she even afford that on top of her rent and expenses? What is she thinking? She should be saving for the baby."

"Now before you get mad at her, calm down for a moment." Danny replied calmly. "I don't know if she could afford it or not, but that's what she's been doing. She didn't want you to wake up and find yourself suddenly homeless. She's also been cleaning your apartment religiously and has probably restocked your fridge by now with all your favorites."

Martin shook his head. "I can't believe she'd do all that for me." He knew that Sam loved him, but he wasn't used to her doing such nice things for him. It was nice that she was trying to be more giving but it was also going to take some getting used to.

"Well believe it buddy. You're quite the lucky man. You've managed to crack Samantha's tough outer shell and bring out the sweet person trapped inside." A smile formed on Danny's face. "Which reminds me, I have to thank you."

"For what?" He was confused. What could Danny be thanking him for? He wasn't aware he did anything to be thanked for.

"For getting Sam pregnant. It's completely changed her. She's not nearly as closed off and she's nicer. She's also happier than I've ever seen her before." He looked over at Martin. "I never thought that she's find someone to make her that happy. Thankfully, I was wrong. I'm glad that you and Sam are rebuilding your relationship. It's probably the only good thing that's come out of this whole mess."

"Yeah, the only good thing." Martin echoed, staring out the window. The rest of the short ride was silent as they drove to Martin's apartment building. When they arrived, Martin tried to grab his bag from the backseat but Danny got there first and refused to let him carry his own bag. Not wanting to fight, he allowed his friend to help and they made their way upstairs.

Unlocking the door, he stepped inside his apartment. Surprisingly it still looked the same. Danny wasn't kidding when he said that Sam had been cleaning his apartment. It looked completely spotless. It was hard to believe that he had been away for three months.

"Home sweet home, right Marty?" Danny commented, throwing Martin's bag on the floor next to the couch.

"Yeah." Martin nodded. "Home sweet home." He took another quick look around before turning back to Danny. "Don't take this the wrong way, but why were you the one to pick me up from the hospital? I thought that Sam would do that."

"Well there was a slight change in plans." Danny replied.

"What kind of change? Is everything ok?" Martin asked.

"Everything's fine." Danny nodded, taking a seat on the couch and stretching out. He was making himself comfortable and taking a moment to relax. "Sam just asked me to bring you home so that she could go to the grocery for you. She was supposed to be here by the time I brought you home but I guess she isn't back yet."

As if on cue, the door opened and Samantha came rushing in the door with two bags full of groceries. "Oh, you're here already. Damn." She frowned as she looked at the bags she was holding. "This was supposed to be a surprise."

Martin smiled at her. "It's ok. Danny had already told me what you were planning on doing for me today."

She sent an angry glare at Danny, who just shrugged it off with a grin. She then leaned in closer to Martin and whispered, "I guess it's a good thing that Danny didn't know everything that I was planning on doing today."

His eyes grew wide and a grin formed on his face at her words. "Well what do you have planned?"

"Not telling." She shook her head playfully. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to put the food away."

Martin watched her enter his kitchen and thought about joining her. After making sure that Danny was busy watching ESPN and making himself comfortable, he followed her and watched as she put away his groceries. "So what did you buy me?"

She laughed at his enthusiasm. He was acting just like a little kid wanting to know what he was getting for his birthday. "Basic food supplies and some other stuff that I know you like." She replied, continuing to pull items from the bags and put them away.

He watched the food that she was putting away and felt bad for a moment. She had gotten him all of his favorite foods. He felt the need to confess. "You know, honestly, I didn't think that you paid attention to the kind of food I kept around here."

She put the bread down on the counter and turned to face him. The playful look on her face had turned into a solemn one. "I know that I wasn't the perfect girlfriend, but I did pay attention. Probably more than you think."

He closed the gap between them and wrapped his arms around her waist. "I realize that now." They both leaned in closer to each other, each anticipating the kiss that was coming. Then they were interrupted by Danny.

"Hey guys, why don't we just order a pizza for dinner?" Danny asked, stepping into the kitchen. Watching Martin and Sam so close to each other, it was obvious that he had just interrupted a special moment. "Sorry. Bad timing."

"That's ok." Samantha sighed, reluctantly pulling away from Martin and going back to putting away the groceries.

Martin was disappointed that he didn't get to kiss Sam, but masked his disappointment with a smile. "So, you want a pizza for dinner? Who said you were staying for dinner?" He half-joked with his friend.

Danny hadn't thought about that. What if he wasn't invited to stay for dinner? He had just assumed. "Oh, well if you want…"

Sam spoke up, linking her arm in Martin's. "Of course you can stay for dinner, right Martin?"

Honestly, as much as he loved Danny like a brother, he wanted alone time with Samantha. But after he saw the determined look on her face, he couldn't argue with her about this. Even though this was technically his apartment, he didn't really have a say in this. "Sure. You know you're always welcome here."

Danny could tell that Martin wanted Samantha to himself and felt bad about hanging around. "Actually, I have to…"

"You are staying and you'll enjoy yourself." Sam ordered. "Now go order the pizza."

After hesitating for a moment, Danny nodded. He had learned from past experience that it was best for everyone involved if he didn't argue with the pregnant woman. "Ok."

She turned and wrapped her arms around Martin's neck, pulling him closer to her—well as close as he could get considering the size of her belly. "You don't mind that I invited Danny to stay, do you?"

What was he supposed to say? If he said no then he would be lying. If he said yes, he would be incredibly selfish and ungrateful. After all, Danny was a good friend who had helped out a lot in his absence. After leaning in and giving her a kiss he said, "Just promise me that he's not going to be here the entire night."

She gave him a kiss and smiled. "I promise. We'll feed him and then cast him out into the cold night air."

He laughed and leaned in for one last kiss before helping her put the few remaining groceries away.


	8. Martin Jr?

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Eight

**A/N:** **Thanks to Lu78 and jtsideout389 for your reviews! Enjoy!**

Two hours later, Samantha, Martin and Danny were still huddled around the coffee table. Martin and Samantha were sitting together on the couch while Danny was sitting Indian-style on the floor. The pizza had been gone for a while and so they had just been talking. Actually, Danny had been telling them bad jokes.

"So they the first guy said, 'does this come in a larger size?'" Danny started laughing at his own bad joke, obvious to the fact that neither Samantha nor Martin was laughing with him.

Martin watched his friend laugh and leaned over to Samantha. "I thought you said we'd cast him into the cold night."

She smiled and gave him a wink. "I did, but we can't be rude."

"Of course not." Martin sighed. He had tried to be patient all night, but he had his limits. Danny and Samantha had been talking about things that had happened while he was in the coma, or referencing jokes and cases that he hadn't been a part of all night. While he knew it was childish to feel so left out, he couldn't help it. He also couldn't help feeling slightly jealous that Danny had been able to spend so much time with his girlfriend. He knew they were just friends and that he didn't have to worry about any kind of competition, but it still rattled him to know that Danny had been able to be there for Samantha at a time when he couldn't.

Samantha noted the impatient look on Martin's face and decided that it was time for Danny to leave. So before Danny had time to start another bad joke, she interrupted. "Well Danny, it's getting late. Martin needs to get his rest. Maybe it's time to break this party up."

"Oh, yeah. Sure." Danny stood up and stretched out for a moment before heading to the door. "It's good to see you getting back to normal Martin."

"It's good to get back to normal." Martin smiled.

"I'll see you both later. Goodnight." And with those few words, Danny left them alone.

As soon as Danny shut the door behind him, Martin wrapped his arms around Samantha's waist and pulled her as close as he could. "So what are we going to do now that Danny's gone?"

She looked at the clock. It was getting late. "I wasn't really kidding about you needing your rest. You're still recovering."

He frowned. The last thing he wanted to do was go to sleep and be confronted with nightmares. He would much rather stay here with Sam. They could talk or find other activities to occupy their time. "I'm fine though. I'm not tired at all."

She looked at him strangely. "Martin, you've got to take care of yourself…"

"I am." He replied gruffly, releasing the grasp he had on her waist and standing up. "I just don't want to sleep right now! I've waited all evening to have some alone time with you. Now that we're alone you just want me to sleep?"

Samantha stood up to face him, trying to understand his point of view. "I'm just trying to look out for you. I don't want you to over-do it. You're still healing from everything."

He could see that his little outburst had upset her so he wrapped his arms around her again. He did appreciate the fact that she was trying to take care of him, but it wasn't necessary. "I'm sorry." Leaning in, he gave her a kiss. "But I'm fine. The doctor says that I am almost completely healed. So can't we just stay up for a while and talk or something?"

She looked at him and realized that he was definitely avoiding going to sleep. The only question left in her mind was why? What was he so afraid of? She didn't want to fight with him so she agreed. "Ok."

"Great." He smiled, leading her back to the couch so that they could cuddle together. Once they got settled and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close, he started the conversation. "Earlier, while I was waiting to be released, I started thinking about baby names."

She smiled, glad to hear that he was getting used to the idea of having a baby. If he was already thinking of names, that was a good sign. "Ok. What were you thinking?"

He placed his hand on her stomach, letting it rest there. "I'm not the type of person who wants to name their child after themselves, so Martin is out."

"Ok." She nodded. "So I guess that means no Martin Jr."

"How about Jonathon?" He asked.

She thought about it for a moment and then shook her head.

"Ok. Brian?"

After thinking about that name for a moment, she shook her head again. "No."

"Ok." He wasn't sure why she didn't like any of the names he was suggesting, but was determined to find the right name. "Steven?"

"Well, that's better than the other two names. But I still don't really like it." She told him. "It doesn't exactly fit well with the middle name I have in mind."

Well at least he finally knew why she was rejecting perfectly good names. "Ok I'll bite. What middle name are you thinking about?"

She gave him a small smile. "Well, I've been thinking about this for awhile now, and I think that we should make the middle name Daniel. You know, because of Danny. It could be sort of a thank you for everything that he's done to help."

He wasn't sure why, but that bothered him. Sure, Danny was his best friend, but he couldn't push away the thoughts of jealousy and resentment he harbored against him. Deep down, he knew that he shouldn't feel any jealousy or resentment towards Danny. Danny was just trying to be a good friend to him and Samantha. It's not like Danny was trying to take over his life and move in on his territory. But the fact remained that Danny had been there from the beginning with this pregnancy, whereas Martin was coming into the game late. It was like arriving at the movie theater late and catching the last half of a movie.

Sam noticed that Martin was being quiet about his opinion of making their child's middle name Daniel. "What's the matter? You don't like it?" She thought he would be fine with it since Danny was his best friend too.

He paused for a moment, trying to figure out the best way to say it without sounding like a jealous boyfriend. "It's not that I don't like it, but why can't we just make Danny this child's godfather?"

"Why can't we do both?" She asked, curious about why he was having a problem with this.

"I don't know. I'm fine with having Danny be the godfather. I guess I just don't understand why we need to name our son after Danny too."

"It would only be a middle name." She reasoned.

"But why?" He asked, still not understanding. "I still don't understand."

She sighed, trying to figure out a way to explain it to him. "These past three months haven't been too great and they haven't been particularly happy for me either. It's been really hard trying to adjust to this pregnancy. It was hard to get used to the fact that I am carrying a child that is completely dependent on me. Every choice of what I eat or drink affects him. The air I breathe, the noises around me, my stress level, it all affects him."

"Stress level? Have you had problems?" He asked, growing concerned.

It was something that she had originally wanted to keep from him, but she realized that complete honesty was necessary if they were to have a solid relationship. "I almost miscarried about two months ago."

"What?" He was shocked and moved to sit up. "What happened?"

She turned to face him. "I was trying to push myself too hard. I wasn't getting enough sleep, I wasn't eating right, and I was too stressed out." She didn't want to tell him that the reason she was stressed and not taking proper care of herself was because she was too busy spending time at his bedside. That would have only made him feel guilty and she didn't want that.

She didn't have to say it, but he knew that she was stressed and not taking care of herself because of him. He didn't like thinking that he was the reason why she almost miscarried, but it was the truth. If he hadn't been in the coma, he would have been by her side. He would have been making sure she got her rest and ate healthy foods. "So what exactly happened?"

She sat up and pulled away from him, sitting on the end of the couch and clasping her hands together in her lap. "I started cramping and having some light bleeding. Luckily Danny was with me at the time. He got me to the hospital in time." She paused and released a heavy sigh. "After a very long discussion with my doctor about the importance of rest, a healthy diet and lower levels of stress, I was released from the hospital. From then on, Danny made sure that I was taking care of myself. There were many nights when he'd bring me dinner or we'd grab something after work. But most of the time he would just say or do something completely stupid and outrageous to get me to laugh. He kept me sane," she hesitated before continuing, "and probably saved our son's life."

He sat there absorbing this new information. He couldn't imagine how scary it must have been for Sam to go through something like that, and he was glad that Danny was there for her. Yet he still felt that jealousy and resentment come back to the surface. Danny shouldn't have been the one at Sam's side. It should have been him. He should have been there for his child and for Sam. As the moments went by, he slowly realized that his coma almost cost him his son's life. Sam was right. If Danny hadn't been such a good friend they might not be having this child.

"I'll understand if still don't want the middle name to be Danny." Sam lied. She wouldn't really understand how he could refuse after what she had confessed to him, but she wouldn't fight him on it. Fighting with him was the last thing that she ever wanted to do.

He cracked a small smile. "No you won't." He knew her well enough to know that she wouldn't truly understand. "But you don't have to worry. I think Daniel is a great middle name."

She started to smile. "Really?"

"Really." He replied, pulling closer to him again and giving her a kiss. "I'm just so sorry that you've had to go through all of this. I wish I could have been there."

"So do I." She nodded. As much as she appreciated Danny being at her side, she prayed every night that Martin would wake up and take over. "But you're here now, and that's all that matters to me."

"I love you, you know that, right?"

"I know." She smiled, giving him another kiss. "And I love you too."

After a few minutes of kissing and making out, he pulled away to have a chance to catch his breath. "Sam, I don't want you to think that I'm ungrateful or anything, but why were you paying my rent?"

She groaned, not really wanting to talk about this. They had already done enough arguing for one night. She wasn't sure she could stand another argument with him right now. "Danny wasn't supposed to tell you that."

"Well he did, and I'm glad he did. I want to pay you back for that. I'll write you a check in the morning."

"No you won't." Samantha flatly refused his offer. "I'm not taking your money."

"Why not?" He asked. "You didn't have to pay my rent for me, but you did. The least you can do is let me repay you for it."

"I didn't do it so that you could pay me back." She sighed. "I did it because I wanted to make sure that when you woke up you still had some sense of normalcy. I don't know what it's like to wake up and find out that so much time has gone on without you, but it's got to be difficult." She was holding on to his hand and started rubbing her thumb across the back of his hand as she talked. "People have changed, things have changed, and nothing is exactly the same anymore. I wanted you to at least have your apartment be the same. I thought it would help you."

Once again he couldn't believe that Sam was being that considerate towards him. She was right when she said that people change. She obviously had. "It does help." He smiled, giving her a soft kiss. "Thank you. Though I still think I should pay you back."

She grinned and let out a mischievous laugh. "Well I won't accept money, but we're both fairly intelligent adults. I think perhaps we could work out a mutually beneficial repayment plan."

He knew where she was going with this train of thought. "Sort of like bartering?"

"Exactly." She nodded. "I paid your rent so in return, you could cook me dinner a few times, give a few massages—you know, that type of thing."

"I'm not sure that should count as repayment." He informed her. "I was already planning on spoiling and pampering you through-out the rest of your pregnancy."

She looked at him incredulously. "Oh you were?"

"Yes." He nodded. "I'd do anything for you. All you have to do is ask."

Her eyes lit up at the sound of that. "Anything?"

"Anything." He repeated.

A grin appeared on her face. "Would you put on a pink tutu and dance around the apartment for my personal enjoyment?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "No. I guess I'm going to have to amend my earlier statement and say anything within reason."

"Damn, and I wanted to see you in that pink tutu." She sighed. "Well how about this instead? Can I stay here with you tonight?"

He kissed the top of her head. "I was already counting on that."

She smiled and leaned in for another kiss, but was interrupted when she started to yawn. "Sorry. Guess I'm just a little tired."

As much as he disliked the idea of going to bed and trying to sleep without having another nightmare, he knew that it was probably time for them to go to bed. Sam was tired and she needed her rest. "Maybe we should call it a night then."

She looked at him suspiciously. "You sure you want to? If I recall, earlier you seemed almost afraid to go to sleep. Now you want to go bed?"

"Yes I'm sure." He assured her.

"Ok." She relented. "Then let's go."

He took a hold of her hand and led her back into his bedroom. It was going to be nice to have her sleeping in his arms again. He just hoped that she was enough to drive away his nightmares. She had already done it once. Maybe she could do it again.


	9. Bacon and Eggs

Somewhere I Belong

Chapter Nine

The smell of bacon and eggs wafted into his nostrils, rousing him to wake up. He resisted at first, choosing to turn onto his side in hopes of reclaiming the peaceful sleep he was having. But when he reached out to the side of the bed where Samantha should have been and found that it was empty, he sighed and opened his eyes.

A smile formed on his face as he rejoiced in the simple joy of getting a good, full night's sleep. He had been right; Sam was his personal dream catcher. The only dream he remembered having during the night was an uneventful dream where a cat was chasing a ball of yarn around in the rain. While that dream was weird, it didn't drain him emotionally as the nightmares usually did. He was very thankful for the opportunity to rest.

Slinging his legs over the side of the bed, he began to wonder about the food he was smelling. It smelled great, and he figured that Sam was cooking, but that confused him. She wasn't the greatest cook. In fact, she usually burned anything that she attempted to cook. Curious to see what was going on, he stood up and walked out to the kitchen. Though nothing could have prepared him for what he was about to witness.

There was Samantha, frying bacon while checking on her scrambled eggs. Amazingly enough, nothing was burning yet. But even more surprising than that was the fact that she was softly singing and swaying her hips to the music playing in the background. She looked absolutely beautiful in his old shirt and baggy pants as she moved to the rhythm of the beat and, as he watched her, he couldn't help but think about how lucky he was to have a second chance with her.

He had always dreamed about having a future with her, full of children and love, but until now he never thought that she would want any of those things—and especially not with him. That's one of the main reasons why he broke up with her. He wanted to settle down, or at least have plans to settle down. Now he had that with her. They were going to be parents in just a matter of months. That was just another one of the things that he had to be grateful for.

Amazed that she still hadn't noticed he was standing there, he leaned up against the doorframe and crossed his arms across his chest. He could spend the whole day watching her and never be bored.

Samantha used the tongs to flip the bacon over and continued to move to the music she turned on. It was turned down softly so that it wouldn't wake Martin up, but she kept it loud enough so that she could still hear it while cooking. Martin was going to be so surprised by her new and improved cooking skills and she couldn't wait to surprise him with breakfast in bed. Looking back, she realized that she should have done these kinds of nice things for him from the beginning of their relationship. Maybe then he wouldn't have dumped her. Shaking her head, she pushed those thoughts out of her head. The past didn't matter now—only the future mattered.

The future. She always hated thinking about the future because it scared her. Maybe it was because she never thought in a million years that she would have a real future. She could easily picture herself as one of those stereotypical old women with no life who just complained about everything and never had anyone who cared about them. Sadly, she had resigned herself to that fate. Luckily though, Martin came into her life and changed everything.

Martin made everything in her life brighter and gave her hope, which was something she had never really had before. He didn't just give her hope for a future, but hope for everything. She found herself smiling a lot more and for no apparent reason, she felt better about her life, and she was generally in a much better mood. Just being in the same room with him and seeing his smile or hearing his laugh was enough to boost her spirits. She loved him for everything he was and everything he didn't pretend to be.

But of course loving him scared her, so she retreated back to her old ways of being cold and unapproachable. She shut him out of her life, refusing to let him know just how much he had affected her and how much she loved him so that he wouldn't be able to hurt her. Ironically though, it didn't work. He broke up with her once he got fed up with her and smashed her heart into tiny pieces.

While she admitted she was mad at him for quite a while for giving up on her and their relationship, she knew he was doing the right thing. It hurt her a lot, but it did force her to confront her feelings about him. Well, in all honesty, it was the breakup and the shooting that forced her to own up to her mistakes as a girlfriend.

When she would sit at his bedside after the shooting, she would reflect on the many ways that she failed as his girlfriend. She'd go through her memories of the time they spent together and catalogue her failings. She'd think of things that she should have done or should have said. What started as a mental list soon morphed into a long list written in a notebook. Once she felt satisfied with that list, she started a new list. This new list contained a detailed description of things that she planned to do if Martin woke up and would give her a second chance. Breakfast in bed was just one of the items on the list.

She continued to sing along with the lyrics of the song from the radio and moving to the beat while she cooked, not realizing that she was being watched. So when she heard a clapping noise, she was startled. Turning around, she was surprised to see Martin standing in the doorway, applauding her.

He had been watching her and waiting for the right time to announce his presence. He chose to reveal himself when the song ended and started clapping. "I didn't know you could sing like that."

She blushed, embarrassed that he had heard her singing and seen her dancing while she cooked. Instead of replying to his compliment, she changed the subject. "What are you doing up? Why aren't you still in bed?"

He smiled and crossed the small kitchen to wrap his arms around her and give her a soft kiss. "Well the beautiful blonde who was supposed to be sleeping next to me was gone. I had to go and find her." He then looked at the stove. "Also, I smelled food."

"I'm making you breakfast." She sighed, slightly saddened that her plan was ruined. "I was going to bring it to you once it was ready if you had just stayed in bed."

"You were planning on giving me breakfast in bed?" He was touched. That was something that he had done for her a few times, but she had never done that for him—partially because she couldn't cook.

"That was the plan, but not anymore."

"Sorry." He could tell that she was sad about not being able to surprise him with breakfast in bed and for that he was sorry. "But you're cooking for me. That's a nice gesture that I appreciate. Is it going to be eatable?"

Her eyes narrowed and for a moment she thought about yelling at him for his comment. Is it going to be eatable? Of course it was. But then she remembered that he wasn't aware of her new cooking skills and she shouldn't get mad at him for that. He was only trying to make sure that she didn't poison him…again. "It's going to be great. I promise you."

He released her from his embrace and watched as she went back to cooking. "It certainly smells good."

She chuckled at the tone of his voice when he said that. "Don't act so surprised."

"I didn't mean it in a bad way." He explained. "I just…well, the last time you cooked it wasn't very good."

"You're right." She agreed. "It was terrible and it made you sick. For that I apologize. This is going to make up for it though."

He was skeptical that it would be good, but would eat it anyway. 'You know, we could always go back to bed and then we could still have breakfast in bed."

She considered his offer for a moment and then smiled. "That sounds good." The food was ready, so she started dishing up the bacon and eggs. Then she reached over to the toaster and picked up the toast. On the counter was a serving tray with orange juice and coffee. She put the plates on the tray and started to pick it up, but Martin reached over and grabbed it first.

"I've got it." He told her, not wanting her to carry anything.

She sighed, knowing that he had good intentions. "Martin, I'm pregnant but that doesn't mean that I can't pick up a tiny tray."

"Just humor me, please?" He asked, leading the way back to the bedroom. Carefully setting the tray on the bed, he fixed both of their pillows before sitting down.

She followed him and carefully sat on her side of the bed, scooting closer to him so that they were touching. Looking over at him, she noticed that he seemed hesitant to eat her food. "Are you just going to stare at the food or actually eat it?"

"Sorry." He chuckled, taking his fork and picking up a large bite of eggs. He was surprised to find that they were great. In fact, they might have been the best eggs he had ever eaten. "What did you do to these eggs?"

Because of the tone of his voice, she wasn't sure if he had enjoyed the eggs or if he thought they were disgusting. "Why? Are they no good?"

"No." He replied. "They're great. Wow Sam, I'm impressed."

She smiled, happy that her cooking lessons were paying off. "If you're impressed by a simple dish like eggs, imagine how you're going to feel once I cook dinner for you."

He looked at her suspiciously. "Ok, who are you and what have you done with the real Samantha? When and how have you become such a good cook? You used to burn everything."

"What can I say? I had a good teacher. Danny gave me some cooking lessons." She proudly replied, picking up a piece of bacon and chewing on it.

Danny had taught her. Of course he had. The more he heard about the time he was in the coma, the more he realized that Danny and Sam had been practically joined at the hip. He wasn't normally a jealous person, and although he knew that Danny and Sam weren't romantically involved, the fact that she spent so much time with him bothered him. "So Danny taught you? That's great."

"Well, I don't know how to cook a lot of things. I only wanted to make sure that I could cook something for you and our child. It wasn't fair that you always had to cook all the meals for me." She smiled. "This way, I can cook for you sometimes."

"That's sweet, but I like cooking for you." He took a drink of coffee.

She laughed. "Can we please not fight about who gets to cook?"

He laughed too. "Yeah, that is kinda ridiculous." He leaned over and gave her a kiss. "We won't fight about who gets to cook. Ok?"

"Absolutely." She replied, initiating another kiss. "So how did you sleep?"

"Fine." He replied, taking his fork and scooping up more eggs. "And you?"

"Great." She replied, picking up another piece of bacon. "I have to admit that I really missed sleeping in your arms."

He smiled. "And I missed having you sleep in my arms."

She picked up the glass of orange juice. "I would have stayed the night with you at the hospital more but I didn't because of work and the bed wasn't very comfortable."

He nodded. "I understand. That's what I figured."

They continued making small talk until they finished their breakfast. "So what do you want to do today?" Martin asked, setting the tray on the floor and stretching out on the bed.

Sam also stretched out, cuddling close to him and letting her arm wrap around him. "I don't care as long as I get to spend my day with you."

"In that case, I have a suggestion." He pulled her close to him and kissed the top of her head. "I know one thing that we could do that we haven't done in quite a while."

She giggled softly. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"I don't know. What are you thinking?"

She propped herself up on her elbow and looked into his eyes. "Well I'm thinking that if we're going to do what you suggested, we're both wearing too many clothes."

"Yes, that is a problem." He replied with a devilish smirk. "Let's see if we can't fix that."


End file.
